10 signs you were born and raised in Poland

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Living in a certain country leaves a mark on you, most likely forever. People that lived in Poland for a larger part of their lives have certain 10 traits that will set them apart from others. These are the things that mostly only Poles will recognize about themselves, it is who they are! So for all of you that maybe have Polish friends this will be a good list to learn about them at least that is what some Matador fans thought.

We believe most Poles will recognize themselves in the next list:

1. Speaking Polish makes you sound angry.

Speaking complicated tongue breaking language like Polish will make people around you think you are angry as hell, they would even turn around and ask you “What happened, did you just have a fight with your parents?” “No, I just told them about my week”.

2. That feel when waking up and smelling freshly-baked ciasto.

On weekends we get guests and this is why Polish culture and the mentality that produced it commands the mother and grandmothers to bake delicious golden sponge cake layered with whipped cream and strawberries, a rhubarb crumble yeast-cake that just had to be available for any guests visiting on the weekend.

3. You have seen a domestic animal get killed at least once, for food of course.

Childhood in Slavic lands is not just strawberries and fun, in fact most of the young Polish kids that have grandparents in the countryside have witnessed how food is produced. That tasty bacon and beef? Well tell that to a Polish child screaming and ruining out of the barn after seeing a pig without a head.

4. You pour bucket of water on people during Easter Monday.

Ice bucked challenge? Please, this tradition is called “Śmigus Dyngus” and initially it was boys who would pour water on girls. Thanks to toy industry today there are water guns so you’re going to get wet no matter if you run or not.

5. Your parents bedroom is actually your living room.

You grew up in a minuscule apartment in a block building, ahh the joy of communist architecture. Apartment that has around 40m2 usually not exceeding 60m2. These buildings were built in 60/s  when socialist revolution was at hand and everybody was flocking from the countryside to the big shiny cities. Small kitchen, small bathroom, living room that is also a bedroom, tiny balcony, yep we know it all.

6. No robot will ever beat your mothers cooking energy.

You visit your parents and what do you see? Incredibly large amount of pierogi, bigos, kopytka and other tasty dishes that are here only so you could stuff your face with it. Good memories.

7. Your father has no clue how to use smartphone but he will fix anything else.

You father can fix it all, be it a car, dishwasher, antena, TV, fridge, roof literally whatever…but when it comes to smartphones you will get a headache trying to explain why you need to press this or that.

8. You were going alone to school since like 1st grade

Slavic children are independent from the birth, you would play around your neigbourhood alone without parental supervisory from your 1st grade. (Okey we have to admit, after all, Polish cities are safe and there is a lot of friendly people around).

9. Your Christmas dinner is made of like 15 dishes made out of 5 ingredients.

Sauerkraut, wild mushrooms, beetroot, fish, poppy seeds, beatroot soup, pierogi stuffed with sauerkrau ,łazankimakowieckutia. Had trouble reading all of these? How about you are expected to eat them all as well, by your grandmother of course. 

10. Polish wedding is a true measure for what a party is.

You think your modern-age party is something wild? Listen to this: typical Polish wedding lasts for two days. Party starts right after the Church ceremony with endless sight of Vodka bottles. Food just won’t disappear from the tables, no matter how much you eat. Everybody get’s tipsy, cheerful and plain drunk. If you didn’t attend a Polish wedding, you have no clue what a party really is.

What do you think?

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